Christianity is a breeze. You decide one day to believe in a man who died but rose again and suddenly you’re sitting pretty. I am almost always happy. Those times where I am not are simply times where God is trying to make me grow or something. That can be a challenge but the rest is pretty great. I can watch whatever I want and think impure thoughts about the men I see because I’m already forgiven. What’s this about abstaining and such? I mean, I waited but I could’ve played the field. I missed out because I bought into some law. There are a lot of Christians who just don’t seem to get it. I used to be one of them up until recently. They look at homosexuals and cast condemnation on them, and they look down on anyone who isn’t following the Bible to a tee. None of that! Christianity is a free ride. I’ve got my ticket to heaven booked in advance. I can buy a plane ticket without having to act like a Jamaican until I reach Jamaica. Why should I have to act like some outdated book of laws tells me to until I reach heaven? I’m saved! Man, Christians can be so intolerant. They think they’re the only ones who have the right answers. Take a look around, everyone has their own means to heaven. In fact, is there really a hell? Well, just in case I have myself on board for the land of clouds and gold paved streets. I know this must come as a shock to those of you who know me to be a devout Christian, but I am finally taking the advice I’ve been given to sit back and relax. I used to be a lot looser but I became uptight like a shirt three sizes too small. It just doesn’t fit me anymore, that is, this way of life. I kept thinking I was under attack by demons but that’s foolishness. They’re just folklore and they have no interest in me even if they do exist. I am not going to waist my time arming myself against an invisible “enemy”. God doesn’t need my time. He’s got a lot of people who occupy His time during the day. It’s not like He is going to miss me. I wish I’d tried this sooner. Just live! Don’t worry about whether it’s right or wrong, just live. Of course, since I’ve started doing this I’ve felt a tight twinge in my chest and the uncontrollable desire to overflow my eyes with tears. I suppose that’ll pass. It’s probably just God trying to get my attention or something. Where is He anyway? He must live WAY out there. Does He even exist? I don’t feel that presence that I used to. Meh, I suppose that’ll pass too. Point is: I am finally getting on with my life…Life, what’s there to live for? I feel so empty now. I can tune it out. I’m learning to tune out that nagging in my conscience. If I can silence that voice, then I’ll be able to partake in something more numbing. I am doing what people think I should though. That’s all that matters in this world. Find yourself and embrace that…Sad thing is, I think I just lost my identity.
****When I wrote this I did not mean it to come across so cynical. It was supposed to be satire. People in general seem to feel Christians are far too judgmental and that they should loosen up. My point in writing this was to share some of the thoughts that have run through my head at one point or another because of trying to "fit in" and just make people happy. Ya know, none of that rocking the boat! However, whenever I subconsciously start to abandon all the things that I once held dear, in favor of more worldly things, I find I am completely depressed. Anyone who wishes me to loosen up isn’t wishing me the best. They are only encouraging me to fall apart. I am sorry if you could not tell if I was serious or not. I can assure you though I may fall down, I am still on the narrow path. God’s still reaching out and pulling me back into His waiting arms. Maybe I could’ve said it better, but saying it the other ways got me nowhere. I was trying to see if this would finally get people’s attention. Thank you for reading and God bless.
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